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100wc#4 by Ellie

Filed under: Fun Stuff — ellies at 1:15 pm on Monday, October 8, 2012

Jacob & Lolo really wanted to go to the WEEE man show  but there mum & dad said no not today but one day mum & dad said “we are going to the WEEE man show today. Jacob & Lolo where very excited, Instantly they set off. It was only about 10 minis down the road when they got there they ran straight over to the notice board it told you lots of interesting facts. like he was three point three tall, he was made in Cornwall, he is as tall as a giraffe’s neck and is all made out of metal.



                          By Ellie



   Jenna (Team 100WC)

10/10/2012 @ 09:16   Reply

I like your concept of your story Ellie,
Keep up the good work!
Congratulations 🙂


   Mrs Halfiord Team 100wc

09/10/2012 @ 20:00   Reply

Hello Ellie, this was an interesting idea for the100wc. It was interesting that you made the model seem to be small. Next time try to add some description to the setting or your characters.


   Jenna (Team 100WC)

08/10/2012 @ 20:17   Reply

Ellie, i like this a lot. You have used your imagination well and that’s what the 100 Word Challenge is all about. i really like how you compared the metal monster to a giraffe.
Well done and keep up the good work 🙂



08/10/2012 @ 18:59   Reply

Hi Ellie,
Your work was fantastic and I like that you have used a good adverb such as instantly. I like you have used a simile ‘ he was as tall as a giraffe’. Next time you could use some connectives such as ‘ however there mum and dad said no’.



08/10/2012 @ 18:01   Reply

Well done Ellie I really like your creativeness, I also like your outstanding adverb ‘Instantly’, next time you could add a conncentive or an pieces of punctuation.

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